Seriously, do not watch Max Payne.
Even if you are an avid fan of the game, do not watch it.
A fan of Mark Wahlberg? Not a reason to watch this flick.
Watched Mamma Mia and the only other movie besides Max Payne available is Disaster Movie? Do not watch it. Just stay at home. Sleep. Eat. Do whatever, but do not watch this movie.
Why am I so critical bout this particular film?
If you watched it, you would feel the same way.
Max Payne may well be the dumbest movie in its genre.
I know, Max Payne is a pure fantasy about a cop who fights supernatural beings. But still, this movie makes a mockery of the audience.
Imagine if you will, Max Payne, a normal human being who is haunted by the lost of his wife and baby to a ruthless murder. No superhero powers. No cape. No underwear on the outside.
He only has one superhero ability. Sheer dumb luck.
He can have ten individuals with machine guns facing off with him who has a mere hand gun. He is running, but every bullet misses him; yet, his bullets seem unlimited in amount, and he manages to kill some of his really blind enemies. Seriously?
The movie has no plot; the action is toothless, and nothing makes sense.
I have no idea why the villains did what they did. I have no clue what all the stupid supernatural crap tie in to the story.
And most of all, I cannot understand why Max Payne would not just lie down and die.
Just by the power of positive thought and a dead wife who comes back into his dreams, he is able to come back from the brink of death to kill everyone in one single gunshot.
With the US economy in tatters, how do movie-making companies allow such mediocre stinkers to make it to the big screen is beyond me.
Nelly Furtado and Ludacris have brief cameos in the film, but they all just add to Max Pain, or in other words, Maximum unrelenting Payne (pun intended).