Wohoo, what better way to celebrate the official completion of my first semester at HELP University College then to relive my four most embarrassing moments in the short four months I started my Foundation in Arts program. First a disclaimer, this shit really happened to me cause you cannot make this kinda shit up. Despite all the pervasive chagrin, here is the list in full and as promised, nothing has been left out.

4. Umbrellas Hate Me
It is without a doubt true, the fact that umbrellas old or new hate my guts. I have no idea why. Just ask the last umbrella I bought which ripped the second time I used it. The first umbrella I used this semester was from my newly-rent room; I dugged it out from the closet. Ill-advised. I decided to go out for a walk to Jalan Telawi where MPH was. On my way back, it started raining. I took out the umbrella and opened it and walked on home. On my way back to my house I felt a lot of eyes were staring at me. Hhmmm, must be my new hairstyle (don’t worry, I am always THIS perasan)! But when I felt the rain tingling my body, I looked up and guess what I saw? An unopened umbrella! Do I need to say more?

My housemates’ buddy Danny, who saw me after that lil incident, summed it all up for me,: “Everything that was in your room cannot be used.”

Second incident involved my second umbrella. I took it for my LAN class. Bad idea. Why? It was my mum’s and sister’s. Why you ask again? It was yellow with flowers on it. Shannon pulled it out from my bag after class. Let’s just say Jane and Shing Yee, whom I just met, never looked at me without picturing an ugly piece of crap.

3. Rats anyone?
Washing machines hate me as well. Following my washing machine virgin days as well as the spinning incident, I strictly thought nothing regarding the washing machine would bother me ever again. You know, put all your dirty clothes in and press on before start and voila, all clean. How wrong was I? One day after doing my laundry, I found out the machine had a castaway. A dead rat! Freaked out was putting my emotions then too lightly. THERE WAS A RAT UNDERNEATH MY CLOTHES IN THE WASHING MACHINE! EEWWW! I dunno if this is embarrassing or just plain old grotesque, you decide. But once my housemates were alerted to my particular visitor, embarrassment was all the emotion I got as I “won the grand prize”, according to my housemate Mohan. Nobody knew if the rat was dead before or after the wash. At least he sacrificed himself to be a clean. God bless him.

3 super-washes and a trip to the dobi later, I am pretty sure my clothes were no longer rat germs infected. I hope.

2. Blind
Ever broken your specs with your bare hands? I have. I did not know my HEROES moment would come during internship with Claudia, who was already in a foul mood with my inability to call anyone (the cause of that, fellow SASA-rians was because at that time, I did not know there was a need to press 9 before any call). Then SNAP, I was blind. Claudia could not get rid of my incompetent ass fast enough.

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Joe took me to get a new pair of specs since I was blind at that moment (the primary reason was rather that I was going to Assunta the very next day so what is eye candy without a pair of good eyes?). Thanks again Joe. But I had to starve a week to pay for the damned specs (joking but it was expensive!). Worth it though in Assunta. HAHA!

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Don is still figuring out how the hell I broke my specs with a single finger. HEROES! Normal people born with special abilities. At least I know Sylar wil definitely not hunt me down for my ability to break specs though.

Shing Yee keeps maintaning that Morgan is a female brand. I rejected that claim. Today I finally found out what my specs brand is. Morgan makes perfumes. Shing Yee 1 Boon Ken 0.

1. Hot Girl + Pink Book = Loser

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This was the book I was buying. I don’t care if it is pink, I am a Princess Diaries fan. This is the 8th book and I have waited so long (stll gotta wait to read it since I have a Malaysian Studies exam tomorrow) to purchase it even though it cost me a fortune and it is hardcover. Well, it cost me my face as well. As I was paying for the book, a hot girl (I mean HOT) came in, and I was like hubba hubba looking like a dumb ass. She looked at me, I looked back, CHEMISTRY! Until she saw what I was buying, I mean pink really does not spell out macho. Now, I know.

Seriously, this SHIT cannot be MADE UP!

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